Buy some Respect

Buy a gun? Gain respect? I found just the place. Only in amerika.

Somebody's Gonna Get Whacked

How many rich bakers do you know? Is it possible for the owner of a bakery in Jersey to own a brand new white Lexus SUV, to have perfectly tailored designer clothes and very expensive jewelry? I dunno. Maybe I'm imagining things but I think tonight in the parking lot of Del Buono's bakery I may have just met my first real life mobster. I'm not embelishing here. The other day I drove by this odd bakery with it's bizarre mascots on the roof and thought it would be a great thing to shoot at night. While I was taking the pictures a door opened in the bakery and a guy in a white apron was giving me the evil eye so I tried to ignore him and continue shooting, besides I was standing on a public sidewalk at the time. I decided to move onto the lot for another shot and few moments later the white Lexus shows up. After a few more snaps the driver pulls right up to me and asks me in his Italian New Jersey accent, "wadday doin?" The guy was staring me down trying to read me. "Taking pictures", I said. "For who?" he asked. "For myself", I said. "For yourself?" He was still trying to read me, "alright." Then he drove off. I took a few more snaps. What is it about having a camera that makes you feel somehow invincible? Time to get out of here dumbass. I really wanted to drive down the street to shoot photos of the outside of this weird "gentleman's club", it has a sign that reads, "parking in rear" and I thought that was great. But that's enough excitement for one friday night in Jersey. I don't want to push my luck. The night adds a real edge to this place.

Holy Cannoli

My first cannoli. Made famous by the Sopranos, which is shot in Jersey. I also had a spinach salad with my take-out. It had so much oil and vinegar on it, it was swimming. So I kept it in the take-out container and rinsed it under my bathroom sink. Even after that it still had too much dressing on it. No wonder there are so many pear shaped people in America.

Garden State

Apparently New Jersey is known as the Garden State. I think it should be renamed the toll-booth state or maybe the biker state as there appears to be a Harley dealership in every small town. I stuck a twenty in the machine at the laundromat to get some change and I felt like I hit the jackpot. Wasn’t expecting them all to be quarters. I’m sure they won’t last long with all these freakin’ toll-highways. Took some pictures at the boardwalk area at Wildwood, less than an hour south of Atlantic City. I’m now in Bridgewood. I was sitting outside my room on the second floor enjoying the sunset and eating some fine Jamaican curried goat I managed to find at a take-out place when I saw three wild turkeys walking across the road. The traffic halted to allow the fourth member of the family to catch up.

Dazed in Days Inn

I thought I’d take some pictures of my room. I thought it would make for an interesting anthropological study. None of it is set up for the pictures. I think the details are interesting. I forgot to take a picture of the dead hooker in the bathtub. Next time. It wasn’t me officer, she was there before I arrived. I didn’t want to bother the maid. Besides I’m not paying for the room so what right do I have to complain? Nobody’s reading this anyways ... Went for a drive through the heart of Atlantic City. If you took a runned down block of NYC and mixed it with a bunch of 1980's Vegas hotels and stuck them on the boardwalk of lonely cement sand coloured east coast beach then you’d have it. I think the Monopoly game is based out of here, there was some kind of Monopoly museum and all the avenues are named after different States. You can see why Donald Trump almost lost all his money here as there are numerous tacky Trump buildings here. Lots of bands are playing here including Paul Simon, the Who, Elton John, Jeff Beck, and Lionel Richie. I’ll pass on the last one.

New York City

Greetings from Gotham. Had a great time at the US Open with my dad and bro. Had some fine wines and yummy cheeses of course. Saw a Dada exhibit at the Museum of Mordern Art and got to see my mom freak out on her first subway ride ever. Good friends, good food and good times! And went to the Letterman show. Sweet. Starting work in Atlantic City on tuesday.